Ken Booker, a truly good man, passed away last week. I'm hardly qualified to write his eulogy, but his life and work are worth sharing.
I would see Ken once, maybe twice, a year. He always had a good word for me, would inquire about my life, and we'd share a laugh. He liked his extended family, but in limited doses. He drove a Lays delivery truck, and worked hard. But he never complained about his work, never talked about "the man" getting him down. He approached his work the way he approached his life: you did what you had to do, and you didn't complain about it.
He married his wife, Sue, at a time when she was emerging from a stormy period of failed relationships. He "inherited" a couple of boys to raise, and eventually had another boy and girl to add to the mix. I never once saw him treat his adopted children any differently than his biological children. Ken wasn't flashy or dramatic. I'm not sure I ever heard him raise his voice. But it was clear that his kids knew the rules, and knew to follow them. As his kids grew up and started their own families, you could see that same sense of calm, no-nonsense fathering in each of them.
When Ken's son Josh passed away, Ken spoke at the funeral about how he and Josh would sit and watch college football together, and how they would go fishing together. I hadn't previously known that about Ken, but I wasn't at all surprised to hear it. Ken found a way to relate to his kids, to communicate his values without being heavy-handed about it.
They say that women seek immortality by bearing children, and that men seek it by creating monuments. Ken's immortality is seen in the way his children act, the way they treat their kids. And I have no doubt that Ken's grandchildren will exhibit the same parenting qualities.
It's common to see children, especially ones that come from families in crisis, grow up and repeat the same behaviors as their parents. Ken, along with Sue and many others, brought stability to his family. He brought clear-eyed values and an appreciation for the things in life that truly matter. He gave that gift to his children, and their children, and to who knows how many generations after that.
Not bad for a guy who made his living delivering snack chips.
